Okay, so I know that sounds like something most Moms do on a regular basis...it is, and it should be. Except for people that have severe anxiety issues, like myself.
Lately things have been getting better with my anxiety. I've been doing little things on my own to build up my confidence, learning what my triggers are, and how to recognize them when they are starting to happen. Catching my triggers early on allows me to deal with the anxiety before it becomes a full blown panic attack. It's actually been a big help, and today I celebrate a small victory in my battle with anxiety.
It was a four hour trip, in total, and even the thought of being out in public (especially for four hours straight) terrified me. To throw in bus rides to and from, a life altering doctors visit, and very little sleep the night before....not fun, to say the least. But an important step in managing my anxiety, and rewarding in the sense that I feel a little more confident for next time.
Facing surgery in the near future is just one more step to being Me again. I'm both scared, and excited....but that's a nice change from just feeling anxious about the entire thing. Scared I can deal with, and excited...well, I've got to become accustomed to that one. The excitement for life was snatched from me as a child, but to have that feeling coming back after feeling numb for so long...it's amazing. I almost feel human again. :)
Slowly but surely, things get better.
Off to catch up on writing some reviews, checking my emails and such. Then it's back to organizing my Pinterest boards. I've been trying to get this task done for quite some time now, but there just seems to always be something else that needs my attention lol. So now I'm trying to really focus on organizing them, before they get too cluttered! (Too late).
Sometimes, the small victories are better than the big one's. What has been your favourite small victory?
Mine is (and I'm still working on it) coming to terms with the fact that I was incarcerated for 10 long, unbearable years, and not once in those 10 years did I hear from my grown child.
ReplyDeleteHi! I'm visiting from Journeys Of The Zoo link up. I was reading your blog and had to agree with feeling anxious whenever I take all 4 kids out. I am so busy with them that I end up forgetting what I actually need.
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